The Artist

I have been sitting on this post for a minute now trying to find the right words of inspiration and truth.  Well, here it goes…

For as long as I can remember, I have always been around anything art or music and have yearned to create.  I have done many little projects but never really considered myself an artist.  Coming from a family of artistic people, (my brother being a self-taught artist, my mother is quite the crafter, my father has a lovely hand at drawing and my God-father was a muralist) how could you not want to create something.  I dreamed of being an artist on a daily basis.  To be able to create something with your hands from a simple idea was completely amazing to me!

Through high school and as a young adult I surrounded myself with artists, my brother’s friends, and friends that intrigued me with their artistic and musical talents.  I dreamed of someday attending an art college, singing my heart out, creating things with my hands, just being me and able to express myself through whatever artistic outlet I chose, but art didn’t come to me the way I wanted it to and they didn’t seem to release any artistic magic that all of a sudden made me an artist by association.  Instead I had my son and many things changed.  I found myself trying to find myself all over again.  Both the hardest and best times in my life.  He inspired me to be a good mommy.  BElieve me!  I have failed many times, but in the end I have the greatest gift of self growth and have felt the success through the love from my child.  I am truly blessed to have so much love from him.

When my boy was a few years old, I enrolled myself into Cinema Makeup School and became a makeup artist.  I figured, hey I’m good at makeup and the word artist is in the title, so why not!  With some failure and hard work, I learned so much about myself and my creative process.  I even taught myself how to sculpt (created my own masks and molds for special fx).  I finally found my inner peace as an artist.  Before you know it, school was over and I lost it.  My original plan to live in Los Angeles and make a living as a makeup artist eventually fell through.  I discovered that I wanted to be around family and friends with whom I could relate and get the support I needed to survive.

I worked as a makeup artist, and still do, during wedding season, but found myself stuck in jobs that did not interest me to make ends meet.  I worked for an employer for a few years who I truly loved and gained a lot of knowledge on business and relations but I stopped growing and lost my job.  As many people can relate, this type of loss whether expected or not, can be very sad and depressing.  I eventually found another job a few months later, with someone I had wanted to learn from, doing what I love, only to learn how not to be as a business owner and was slowly removed from the schedule.  Wow, how did this happen again.  I thought, “What’s wrong with me?”  I fell in to that state of mind.  I became many things that I am not.  Blamed God and everyone else.  Only to find that I had completely lost everything that made me, me!  What happened to wanting to create so bad that I could close my eyes and see myself being my dream Genevieve?  I can see her now smiling as she spins some pottery or painting on a piece of something found, while her children play in the tree house dressed in their handmade costumes, watching her husband rest on the grass, listening to the birds in her garden,  thinking of how long I have waited for this moment and being grateful of God’s grace.  I know pretty far-fetched, but who says a girl can’t dream.  I’m full of them!

This blog was created to inspire me and hopefully others to live their dreams.  I have since began homeschooling my boy, found my major, recently engaged to the love of my life also the father of my child and am rediscovering my love of all things simple and aesthetically pleasing to the eye.  I am here to bring out the artist in me, find my passion if that is even possible because I am a lover of many things and to motivate me to not get lost in the life of the everyday mom, as it is very easy to do.  I love my boy more than he’ll ever know and especially love making things for him and my loved ones.  I just want to find balance as a busy mom and learn to love myself a little more and create my happiness, so I can grow to be a greater person in all areas of my life.  As a mother, wife, daughter, sister, stranger and friend.

My definition of the everyday mom: always doing for others and never doing for herself.

p.s. take the time today to think of your accomplishments and be proud of who you are, but if you find yourself still feeling a little empty, ask yourself, “What is missing?”

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3 thoughts on “The Artist

  1. Gen,
    All I can say is WOW!!! You never cease to amaze me. As I am not as crafty and creative as you are..I sat here reading all of your post and it actually brought me to tears. You are an inspiring, motivated, beautiful, amazing woman, mother and friend. I love you sooo much and am blessed to call you my best friend. This is the kind of thing you were meant to do and I look forward to hearing all of your ideas and maybe trying some on my own. I LOVE LOVE the costume dress up case. Oh man, I remember wishing I had something like that growing up. We would dig through my mom’s closet and jewelry box and spend hours creating costumes and taking pictures of our creations. As I am technologically challenged please let me know how to keep up with your blogs. I can’t wait to read what you will post next. You need to put out a magazine…I believe we talked about this before. You have the drive and motivation, and oh my gosh, the creativity and imagination to do so. I love you very much. Please make sure you blog about inexpensive ideas to keep kids entertained. You always had the best ideas to do for the boys back when we were both single moms struggling to make it. I know that other single moms out there would love to have the priveledge of picking your brain to keep their little ones entertained on a budget. Oh and the little notes idea is great. I used to do that sometimes but stopped for no real reason other than I got caught up in life. But after reading this, you have inspired me to do so again. After all what is the point in getting caught up in life if you are not enjoying it right? Don’t get me wrong, I am happy in life right now but what good is the cake without all that yummy icing! Lol
    Anyway,
    I love you always….Sheena

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